How To’s for Choosing the Best Man and Matron of Honor
Posted on August 7, 2008 - Filed Under wedding
The trick with having a wedding party is that eventually you’re going to have to choose someone to be the ‘best’ something. Women have it slightly easier because they can opt to have a Matron of Honor as well as a Maid of Honor, but even so, it’s a difficult decision to make.
Any tips?
Ladies first
Many women feel the pressure of having to choose their ‘bestest’ friend for the honor of being Matron or Maid in their wedding. They feel like they are leaving one of their friends out or hurting their feelings. First of all, realize that the duty of being in the wedding party is enormous. The Matron of Honor has a lot to do before and during the wedding itself, so you will want to choose someone that you think can handle it.
If you’re the bride, you may feel that you have to choose a family member as well, but that’s not necessary. You might include them as a part of the party, but if you have a really close friend that you want to bestow the honor upon, then do so.
Find someone who isn’t overly busy or committed. If they live in the town that you’ll be married in, that’s great too. Even if you’re out of town, you’ll get to be able to visit each other and she can make arrangements while you’re at your home. You also want to find someone who isn’t financially burdened. The thing is that gowns, showers, bachelorette parties, and gifts all cost money, so you don’t want to stretch them.
And then the men
Just like choosing the Matron or Maid of Honor, you don’t want to choose someone that ’should’ be the Best Man. This should be someone that you can count on to plan the bachelor party and get the other groomsmen to stay on schedule. Of course, your best friend may fit this bill, so the decision might be easy. Again, don’t pick someone who doesn’t have a lot of time or is financially strapped.
Picking someone to be your right hand person is an important decision and an honor for the person that you ask. Although you may think that they are the right person, they may decline the offer and the extra work. In that case, you will need to find someone else to fill the role.
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Tags: bride, groom, marriage, married, weddingsChildren in Weddings — Yes or No
Posted on July 23, 2008 - Filed Under wedding
Children are wonderful in weddings and often are the “scene stealers.” Generally serving as ring bearers and flower girls, they will do exactly what they want to and they will be — yes, absolutely — they will be children. Some make it down the aisle and some do not. Some walk, some run, some dance. Some make faces at the guests, some cry, some refuse to go down the aisle and some need to hold mom’s hand for courage. Regardless of what they do, they are wonderful and will almost always lend a little comic relief to the otherwise solemn ceremony.
I watched one beautiful little 3 year old flower girl place one flower petal at a time geometrically all the way down a very long aisle while people on both sides were telling her to hurry. Paying no heed, she did it her way. When she got to the front row where her mother was seated, she was obviously pleased with herself and she stood in front dancing throughout the ceremony. It was priceless and a wedding that this officiant will not forget. In another wedding the two ring bearers, each two years old, one dressed in black formal western wear and the other in a kilt, never made it down the isle but they had a wonderful time and so did everyone else who watched them. One little ring bearer announced loudly, “Mama, mama, I have to go make boats” and was quickly whisked away to the bathroom as the guests tried hard to suppress their laughter.
A WORD OF CAUTION HERE: IF you are an “up-tight” bride or groom or mother-of-the-bride who must have everything letter perfect or you will consider the whole thing a national disaster, DO NOT HAVE CHILDREN IN YOUR WEDDING. The stress of worrying about what a child will or will not do is just not worth it. But if you want a wedding that is warm and real and beautiful then let little Susie and Mary throw flowers all the way down the aisle, on the guests, or on themselves and have little Timmie be the ring bearer using the ring pillow as a ball or balancing it on his head. This is certainly not the way you practiced it at the rehearsal, but it will be special and something you will never forget.
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Choosing A Mother Of The Bride Dress - Pleasure Or Predicament
Posted on July 10, 2008 - Filed Under wedding
If you’re the mother of the bride at an upcoming wedding, congratulations! You have a major part to play in supporting your daughter as she prepares for her big day. Being the mother of the bride (or the M.O.B., as she is sometimes known these days) is a role which calls for understanding, tact and diplomacy in many delicate areas, not least being the question of wedding attire. As well as helping your daughter to select her bridal gown, you have another tricky choice to make: finding your own mother of the bride dress.
As with most aspects of wedding planning, there are conventions that some couples wish to follow and others they will prefer to ignore. But if you know what the ‘rules’ are, you’ll be better able to decide when you want to break them! And in most cases, the principles governing mother of the bride gowns are designed to allow her due precedence — without overshadowing the bride herself!
- Appropriate color. Many people feel that mother of the bride dresses should not be white or black. In the first case, of course, it’s because white is traditionally the color reserved for the bride. The second rule harks back to a time when the bride’s mother could signal her unhappiness at her daughter’s marriage by wearing the color of mourning.
While such a gesture might be thought extreme in today’s world, it is still frowned upon in some quarters for the M.O.B. to wear black — perhaps simply because it might be considered bad luck. These days, however, what’s appropriate is often dictated by the style of the wedding and the bride’s preference — and in an era when evening weddings are not unusual, black might be an acceptable choice.
- Coordinate with the mother of the groom. While it’s customary for the M.O.B. to choose her dress first, it’s considerate as well as prudent to liaise with the groom’s mother in matters of style and color. This will at least minimize the risk of both mothers turning up to the wedding in the same outfit!
- Complement the dresses of the bride and bridesmaids. As a member of the wedding party, the eyes of the guests will be drawn to your outfit too. Plan well ahead with the bride to decide on an age-appropriate design and color to coordinate with their styles.
As part of the build-up such a joyous event as a wedding, choosing a mother of bride dress ought to be fun. And while finding exactly the right outfit may require a considerable expense of time, energy and shoe leather, it’s a task that you can enjoy in the company of your daughter or a close friend or two, if you like. After all, the wedding will be partly your day too!
Nigel Patterson is a business writer and publisher of http://Inexpensive-Weddings.com
Visit his website for tips and ideas for creating your dream wedding on a tight budget: wedding dresses, invitations, rings, cakes, wedding favors, flowers and more …
Tags: bridal gown, bride, bridesmaids, dresses, groom, mother of the bride dress, wedding, weddings keep looking »